I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
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