My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
