let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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