sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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