He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
