some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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