The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
