I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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