Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
