Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i just google imaged poop.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
