remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
