She is in my trunk
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
