Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
