Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
