We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize