We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
