it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
