dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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