the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
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