i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She even gives head with a lisp.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
