Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
