she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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