Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
