? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize