what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
whose parrot is this?
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
