One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
