They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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