dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
my phone needs a breathalizer
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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