Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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