New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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