Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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