He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Randomize
