I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
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