So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Randomize