Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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