i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
