That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
