one might say we're banned from that church
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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