C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
