my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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