I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
