singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
