Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize