guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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