She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
