Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize