now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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