I feel like I'm in dance class right now
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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