so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
