Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
