her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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